Mall rats

Weekday trips to the mall reveal a certain detestable segment of suburban society. These people should be avoided and/or one should avoid trips to the mall on a Thursday afternoon.

I am no snob but I must draw the line somewhere. This afternoon, on an errand to find something to wear to a simple event tomorrow, I encountered WAY too many career professional mallists at Washington Square. Yes, mallists. Mallists are also known in San Francisco and Marina chicks. Or anyone living in Walnut Creek. The definition is flexible and generally refers to the kinds of people you would sidestep to avoid and hope to Jesus you never have the bad luck of standing in line next to. Especially if they are making a return.

The first mallists were in the TBD department of Nordstrom. TBD, for most people, means "To Be Determined." The acronym is in the same family as TBA (To Be Announced), etc. Very simple. The TBD department is located in a very conspicuous part of the ground floor. There is a reason for this. It is the section where the younger, financially-endowed people shop in. The clothes are cute and it is also where the expensive jeans are. I surmise the reason it is located in this part of the store is because it looks GOOD for the store to have all its other shoppers be able to see these attractive people buying somewhat expensive and very trendy clothing. It makes the store look hip and that is what is important in retail.

I shop there because they sometimes have cute tops and jacket thingies. I can't really fit in the jeans because my body works hard to retain its Russian roots and I tend to have difficulty finding things that fit my lower half. I dont really have the money to shop there, but on occaision it is okay and doable.

I encountered a mallist there being helped by a TBD worker. They were in a very serious discussion and it went something like this (forgive me if I get the brand names wrong, I don't pay too close attention to that but I need to include them here):

Mallist: "So I definitely wouldn't describe myself as a Citizens person - which make their clothes for very tall people. I guess I have been known for my AG's, Seven's and sometimes I will even wear Paige. It is just so hard, you know, to choose between all of them for once. I am just sick of being in between all these brands. I just don't know."

TBD Saleswoman: "Yes, it is very difficult. Why, these Citizens I have been wearing just don't feel right. I mean, they look damn good, but I don't feel like a Citizen girl. You know?"

Mallist: "Completely!. Oh, it is nice to know I am not the only person feeling this way."

TBD Saleswoman: "Indeed. Well, what do you think about the colors of these? They are so reminding me of that run of Sevens that came out in Spring '05. Wow, that was a hot season!"

Mallist: "Oh, right. But I wouldn't want anyone to think they are from '05. What else have you got?"

It went on an on ad nauseum. All I could think about was escaping, but not before I tried on a cute Ben Sherman top. Which, of course, I ended up not getting. Instead, I went to boring JCrew and found some things on sale.

Success of this outfit? TBD, of course.